Monday, May 3, 2010

Teaching Anxiety?

Last night was not a good night for me. I didn't sleep well. And it was all because I was nervous about starting my class at the ELC (English Language Center) today! I didn't really feel that nervous about starting teaching today. I have felt really excited and happy to teach at the ELC. But I must have had some inner anxiety about it, because it was definitely manifested in my lack of good sleep last night.

First of all, I teach at 8:15am. So I have to get up at 6:00am in order to get to class on time. I've done a couple of practice runs catching the bus, and I was satisfied that I can do this all summer long. However, last night I frequently woke up and looked at the clock. Every single time I looked at the clock, I was worried that I had missed my alarm and that I was going to be late for work.

Secondly, when I was asleep, I was dreaming about my class syllabus and calendar. What!? I mean, doesn't a dream usually have at the very least a plot, even if it is incoherent? My dreams last night did not. I dreamt only in images of my syllabus and calendar. It was kind of like those slideshow presentations, where the images just transition from one to the next. Crazy? I think so!

But my first day of teaching wasn't bad at all! I really think that when this subconscious anxiety works itself out, it will be really easy to get up at 6:00am for work. And I am really going to enjoy this class. It's a reading class, which I've always wanted to teach! And it makes me feel really productive to get going on my day right away. I just hope I don't have any more syllabus dreams! They're really boring!

2 comments:

KateHazen said...

Hahahaha! I'm so sorry you were unable to sleep but I'm glad your class went well! I used to have dreams about unsolvable mathematical equations the night before my chemistry or math tests so I completely understand the syllabus/calendar dreams! I hope they don't last too long!

Ashley Bybee Stepp said...

I've had those nights before! Good luck teaching this summer. It sounds like a great position!